effervescible: (huh?)
Jaina ([personal profile] effervescible) wrote2002-10-01 10:56 am
Entry tags:

I love pumpkin, but I don't LOVE pumpkin

MICHIGAN - A man who walked nude in his back yard and was spotted by
neighbors using a pumpkin to sexually gratify himself was sentenced this
week to 90 days in jail for indecent exposure.

Bill Saintclair Patton, 45, was jailed on an unrelated domestic violence
charge when he was brought to 37th District Court on Tuesday for the
2-year-old indecent exposure case.

Residents on Lyons Circle East complained to police in November 2000
that Patton masturbated in the yard, and that they later saw him commit
a sex act using a pumpkin, in plain view through a basement window.

The act is similar to a scene in the movie "American Pie".

"If that's where he got the idea to do this, I don't know," said Warren
Detective Sgt. Gary Johnson: "I can't think of any (other) report I've
ever seen of a guy doing anything with a vegetable or fruit."

According to the Michigan Department of Corrections Web site, Patton is
a habitual criminal and sexual delinquent.

The 90-day sentence pleased at least one resident in Patton's
neighborhood near 13 Mile and Mound roads.

"It makes me feel better," said the resident, who asked to not be named.
"That stuff freaks you out. I wanted a better neighborhood for my kid."

Source: Macomb Daily

[identity profile] wik.livejournal.com 2002-10-01 08:19 am (UTC)(link)
What? Vegetables need love, too!

[identity profile] fadingembers.livejournal.com 2002-10-01 08:38 am (UTC)(link)
:: cries :: But they don't say what happened to the pumpkin...

Roommate: Say, this pie sure is gooey...I think there's too much milk in here.

Casey: Waaaaaaa

>^..^

[identity profile] jaina.livejournal.com 2002-10-01 08:44 am (UTC)(link)
Oh fer ew.

[identity profile] caitlin.livejournal.com 2002-10-01 02:22 pm (UTC)(link)
iiiiiiiiiick!

well, at least it was safe sex. ;)

C.

I think he was....

[identity profile] egaumer.livejournal.com 2002-10-01 06:10 pm (UTC)(link)
Listening to a bit much Moxy Fruvous:

"And also, when I was 15, free love with my beautiful, and wilted,
yet fresh, pumpkin!

And also, when I was 16, with... my... kiwi..."

Re: I think he was....

[identity profile] jaina.livejournal.com 2002-10-01 06:29 pm (UTC)(link)
Can one truly listen to too much Moxy Fruvous?

Okay. So I haven't listened to a ton myself. But I do like what I have heard.

How was the typhoon?